Of those who have actually read this blog. I have to say thank you. Truthfully I don’t keep up with it as much as it should be kept up with. Yet, tonight I must actually write a blog that involves some ridiculousness in my life. If you are not a fan of drama, then do not read further.
Keeping this short I pray, this is my rant. You see there is this mutual friend of mine whom I started to like and I believed she me. We even made out once via her front yard after an evening of some drinks and friends. With this in mind follow me…
…Days later after we were hitting it off I met up with her a our place to have some drinks, only that she was not alone. She was waxing some other guys ego and ignoring me while hanging with her friends. I thought, better to not push anything and move on. So I did.
Come now about three weeks ago. I was at the same said bar hanging with a number of friends when two approach me and advise me of this growing situation via a slip of the mouth. While speaking of my sex life and my avoidance of intercourse until a real commitment…really that was the subject matter…one of the friends said something along the lines of “yeah right that is not what I heard.” Thus I inquired further to hear that my friend whom I was interested in may have been sabotaging my name saying that her and I had sex.
Wow!!! I didn’t know this. I must have actually gotten drunk when this happened because I don’t remember this at all!!! Yet, the funny thing is that I have not been drunk in nearly two years. THUS, it did not happen. So my stomach sank. And further, I have a reason now to talk to that girl again. So I did via a social networking site. This is what was said:
” Supposedly there are some rumors and fabrications going about. I found out last night that some people think that we have been intimate, even though we haven’t of course. Some people have been saying you have been perpetuating that rumor and supposedly I have been too. Don’t know how that is considering that it is not true, I never said that, and that I found out about this rumor last night. And as I hear, a number of our friends think this.
Have you heard about this? “
Then the girl,” First of all that I said it is complete BS. Second whovever said I said it is bullshitting. And third the ONLY words that have ever left my mouth on th subject, are “I want to know who is telling people this because I don’t have the time or the energy to deal with it.” Which is true. I have a lot going on in my life right now and this childish BS is the last thing I need. SO I am going to find out who said what, and when I do they’re going to get more than and earful and they aren’t gonna like it. I’m not in high school anymore, and I’m too old for this shit.”
And I responded simply, “sounds good to me.” Now the part in her text that scared me a bit about where her mind was was the first set of sentences. Reread them if you must, and you will see she completely pretends my generalizations, similar desires, and push to find the truth were not there and that I may have been accusing her. Her very first words were very defensive.
Well as truth goes it gets pummeled. Which brings me to tonight. I assume she did not expand her search pattern and obviously did not seek out the truth because she got mad. So mad that she accused me in front of many of my friends as well as her friends, mutual and not, and broke me. That much of a lie pushed me hard. I have been trying keep my self reserved as much as possible for the longest time. But her yelling brought me to scream at her the only thing I could get out that would hopefully get my point across before she ran away. “I never said that!”
The hurt of this drama comes from the fact that there was a fabrication and it got in between me, friends, co-workers (whom run the bar), and her. And that she fell into the trap of the rumor-machine. Though she is normally a sweet and very intelligent person, tonight? She was not. And this actually will not be the last of it. I still work there. And that is her marching ground. I do not want a fight. And that is my goal, nothing else. I want truth and peace. IF I were able to get a friend returned to me, that would be wonderful. I pray actually this happens, but as it goes a prayer is all I have until next time. Right now, it all wants to fall apart…